Polecat-Americans
Sunday, March 25th, 2007J. D. Pendry
Polecat…any of several carnivorous mammals of the weasel family… any of various common omnivorous black-and-white New World mammals of the weasel family that have a pair of perineal glands from which a secretion of pungent and offensive odor is ejected… an obnoxious or disliked person – Merriam-Webster OnLine
How’s your morning commute? Mine is mostly pleasant. By choice, half of it is on a winding two-lane blacktop through the countryside. US Route 60 if you’re curious. It doesn’t have the maniacs one encounters on the DC Beltway (did that commute too), but it does have its adventures. It is a slalom of dead possums, raccoons, combative whistle pigs and deer. Nothing I encounter along the way, however, quite comes up to what a polecat recently converted to pavement pizza can do to an otherwise pleasant Spring morning. The lingering stench from exploded perineal glands overwhelms your olfactory senses and permeates your vehicle. It easily surpasses the gag factor and linger of pinto bean generated methane.
I was at work the other morning after a polecat encounter brooding over the mounds of paper that are constant no matter what I do and enjoying my morning snack of pork rinds and coffee. The polecat’s stink was still fresh in my irritated nostrils and mind when I thought I’d check the news headlines on the Internet. That’s when I decided I needed to add obnoxious and pungent Polecat-American weasels to my growing list of Hybrid-Americans.
How does one get the distinction of having a Polecat hyphenation added to his or her American-hood you might wonder?
One way is to abandon the people whose sacrifices throughout our Nation’s brief history have enabled you to sit fat and happy in an elected seat of a free representative republic. There are more, I’m sure, but at least 218 members of Congress earned that distinction this past week. They did it by turning their backs on our Soldiers in order to play at the rich kid sport of politics. Not only did they turn their backs on what our Soldiers and their Commanders need to survive in combat with our enemies, they seem rather proud of themselves for having done it. They also sent a message to our enemies by providing them with our run-away date. All the beheaders need to do now is to wait for the outcome they prophesied. America will run away. Polecat-Americans must be impervious to their own retched stench.
The United States has the military might to defend itself and defeat any enemy, whether terrorist or nation on this planet, but lacks the political will and courage in Congress to punch its way out of a wet paper bag. Instead of confronting the threat, they’d rather pass legislation that slow-bleeds our Military and country to death while it gives away millions of your dollars, and mine, for spinach, milk money, peanuts, shrimp…. If I were an enemy of the United States, I would know that my greatest ally is a U.S. Congress with a majority of Polecat-Americans in it who are always more inclined to engage in domestic political combat than they are to engage in combat with me.
The skunks in Congress have a constituency. Many of them, like Bill Maher, were publicly distraught when an assassination attempt on Vice President Chaney failed. In Milwaukee, part of the polecat constituency vandalized an Army Recruiting Office by smearing human feces around it. In Portland, Oregon, protestors burned an American Soldier in effigy. Let that sink in for a minute before you ponder this excerpted below:
“Perhaps the most disturbing scene of the afternoon, however, involved the man who pulled down his pants in front of women and children and defecated on a burning U.S. flag. This disgusting act actually elicited cheers from some members of the crowd, but we hope that the emotion it produces in the community is one of revulsion.”
When it comes right down to it, these animals are merely parroting and acting out the rhetoric of the Polecat-Americans sitting on their fat butts in Congress. How else should we expect an ill-parented kid brainwashed in the public education system to treat what Congress labels as cold-blooded murders (John Murtha), Nazis, gulag tenders and Pol Pot-like (Dick Durbin), uneducated and terrorists (this time around John Kerry), torturer chamber operators (Ted Kennedy) too dumb to do anything else (Charley Rangel)…. What’s interesting is that to a Man and Woman, the members of the United States Armed Forces will tell you that the reason they lay it on the line everyday is so that Polecat-Americans can act like the idiots they are.
Freedom is a wonderful thing and we have more of it here than anywhere else I can think of. As dangerous to our country as are those who wish our destruction are the people who exercise their freedoms irresponsibly. They have the right, preserved by the sacrifices of many good Men, Women and their families, to act out as they do.
I enjoy those same rights. I have the right to say that these people are neither Patriots nor good Americans. They’ve never sacrificed a thing or made one single commitment to preserve the freedoms they enjoy in our country. Most, I’d wager, have never worked, had any responsibility or made a decision other than who gets to carry the bag of crap to the recruiting office. A Patriot and a good American exercises his freedoms responsibly and expresses his or her grievances with the government, the war or any thing else on his mind in a civil manner. Americans should speak out when they disagree, but they should also have the gumption to face our Country’s real enemies when it’s called for.
When you choose to burn an American Soldier in effigy or deficate on an American flag or, in the case of Congress, abandon our Soldiers in the field I have, but one small request. When the danger comes back to our shores, and it will, go find another Polecat-American to protect your rancid existence. Our Soldiers will be too busy.
Copyright © J. D. Pendry 2007

